10-6-13
Weather Report From Heaven: Sunny and bright, with an abundance of light and lots of singing and rejoicing.
Bible verse of the day: Psalm 42:7 " Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls; all your waves and breakers have swept over me.
I have been going through one of the most intensive processes in my life of self examination and repentance in my walk with the Lord over the last few weeks and it has produced a myriad of emotions. I have asked the Lord, as King David did in Psalm 139:23-24, to "search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." God is always faithful and He has been revealing quite a lot to me during this period from some of the areas of my life that I haven't even been aware were in such desperate need of my repentance and His forgiveness. Some of the things He has revealed have been surprising, humbling, sad, joyful, liberating, energizing and hopeless.
The one truth that has constantly been present in my time with the Lord is the idea that there is always a deeper and more intimate relationship that the Lord our God seeks with us, His children. God is not jealous of us, but He is jealous for us and He desires that we spend more time in his presence so that we can begin to assume the character and traits of His Son and our Savior, Jesus Christ. He gives us a glimpse of this desire in 2nd Corinthians 3:18 which says, "and we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into His likeness with ever increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit."
In order to be transformed by something or someone, we must first spend time with the thing or person that we wish to be transformed by. God wants us to spend time with Him alone so that He can reveal hidden truths to us. We are in bondage and He wants to set us free, but to be free from something we first must realize that there is a problem and truthfully admit that it exists. Alone time in the presence of the Lord is where God can do His surgical work on our hearts and souls. He can reveal deeper truths about His intentions, our understanding, or lack thereof, His level of forgiveness, our level of sinfulness. He can show us many things about how deep His love is, how He never stops pursuing us, how deep we need to forgive others as He has forgiven us. Spending time alone in His presence is like a getting a PHD in wisdom from the Creator of the Universe. He can quickly break into our kingdoms of selfishness and pride and reveal to us how far apart "His ways are from our ways and His thoughts are from our thoughts," as Isaiah 55:5:8-9 says.
I have been amazed at the subtle areas of my sinful pride that have been revealed during these alone times with Him. It is easy to spot anger, greed and lust, but my delusions of being in control of situations, which has led me to feel anxious as I am trying to accomplish things on my own strength or for others to validate me, rather than to bask in the Lord's glory and strength, has been revealing. Always deeper are His revelations, and always more humbling is the repentance required by me. But the deeper the humbling, the more freedom I find on the other side of that experience. We as Christians are required to repent on a regular basis. Not so God can humiliate us, but rather so the power of His grace can be seen and felt in our lives. James 4:6 says " God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble."
Our sin can destroy our lives and our testimony, but His grace, mercy and forgiveness can restore us. I feel like the deeper I get with the Lord, and the more vulnerable I am willing to be, the more His grace can wash over me and bring new energy into my being. He alone can take an area of my life that is dead, and create new fruit and beauty out of the barrenness, once it has been healed by His amazing grace. That makes me crave my time alone with the great Physician. The deep revelations give way to greater wisdom and healing. He always wants what is best for me. I just need to show up to the appointments, so the healing and restoration can take place. Being honest with myself and admitting how great my sin is and how desperate I am for Him is the great struggle. He responds with Deeper love, mercy and grace than I could ever imagine.I find myself stunned by the depth of His love, which is endless. He implores me to trust Him more and surrender more, so He can take me deeper into our relationship. His goal is simple, yet profound. Always deeper!
